Today I woke up tired. I tried to go to bed early to make up for the weekend, but, I didn’t get to bed as early as I wanted to. So my cranky pants decided that the best way to set up my day was to make sure that I didn’t make myself even more tired. I skipped my run, which was probably a contributor to my mood at the end of the day, but at the time it made sense to me that if I was tired, going for my run would only make me more tired. I took my youngest to the park instead, which was a lovely part of my day. I watched her play with a couple of other little girls and was happy to see her interacting and playing well. We even got a little walk in, just the two of us. We came home and had a lovely picnic in the backyard. We read books, and then she laid down for her nap.
I came downstairs and started working on my updates for the website, and luckily looked up and remembered that my oldest had a dentist appointment after school. I texted her to tell her to make sure she didn’t go to track today and that I would be picking her up when she got out of school.
I had a bout a half hour before I had to leave, so I took a quick 15 minute nap and didn’t feel half bad when my alarm went off. I was even able to schedule an appointment with the DMV for Wednesday to take care of a couple of things.
I got my oldest to her dentist appointment, picked my son up and got all the kids some new shoes. All of them were wearing pretty worn and small shoes, so it was time. They were all happy and everything was going well. The dentist appointment did run long due to the office being backed up, but we got home in time for me to make breakfast sandwiches for dinner. I cooked up some eggs with some left overs and it turned out well. Everyone ate and we were out the door to bring my oldest to her Civil Air Patrol meeting.
There are moments when we have choices of how to react to someone. Today, I made a poor choice. We carpool with another member of CAP. Normally, I have no problem with him. He’s a very arrogant teenager that believes he knows everything, even though he doesn’t and is wrong about quite a few things, but normally I just shake my head and ignore the conversation. Today, however, my irritation level was already pretty high, so it didn’t take much for me to react poorly and tell him to be quiet in a very unkind manner. I could defend myself and come up with a million excuses as to why it was okay for me to react to him this way, but the truth is, I am at fault for letting him get under my skin. I chose to react childishly and very immaturely, and it was over something silly. After I dropped the older kids at CAP, I reviewed the conversation and became pretty upset with myself that I let such a wonderful day be slightly tainted by a poor decision to react to silliness.
I am glad that I took the time to think about my actions, though. I do intend to apologize the next time I see him. I am the adult, and he is the child. Regardless of the reasons I feel I could use to defend my reaction, I should have taken the higher ground and just shook my head while the conversation took place.
I have also learned that sleep is very important. I try to get work done at night, while my children are sleeping, but even when I blog that I am going to go to sleep early, I tend to find things that I “have” to do before I go to bed. My sleep deprivation makes it harder for me to reality check myself. I am a happier, more positive person when I get enough sleep and I get my exercise in, and I eat well. This weekend, I failed at all three of these things. I usually try to make sure we do something active at least one of the days, but I didn’t really run around all that much, and was eating worse than I normally do. As far as sleep, well, I made some bad decisions and stayed up much later than I should have both nights this weekend watching shows. I will rebound from this and hope to be feeling much more like myself tomorrow. Now that I know what I need to focus on to make myself slightly healthier and happier, my next step will be sticking to a consistent bedtime schedule, no matter what. I’ll keep you posted on how it goes.