Today was a good day. There was nothing extraordinary about it, but everything sailed through, even when rough waters were encountered. These are the days that always remind me that in the end, we decide not what happens to us during the day, but how we react to the things that happen.
My son woke up tired, so I knew to prepare myself for several meltdowns today. I think because I mentally and emotionally prepared myself, I approached his cranky, hangry loss of control with a great deal more finesse than I usually do. I cannot remember why he lost control this morning, but he fell into a tantrum while my husband was on the phone. He refused to say goodbye to my husband. I squatted down next to him, gently rubbed his back and said, “Don’t be mad at Daddy, he didn’t do anything to you.” He immediately started sobbing and grabbed the phone from me and cradled it. It was one of those moments that pulls at the heart strings. It reminded me that not only do we have the day to day stresses, but all of us deal with my husband’s absence in different ways. My son is missing his Daddy and doesn’t know how to express that emotion or what to do about it. My husband reminded him that he could hug his Daddy doll and my husband would feel it. Now, the Daddy doll travels in the car with us and goes on all of our adventures.
I took my youngest daughter to a newer jumping/bouncy castle indoor place today because the wind was blowing roughly. She had a blast climbing up and going down the slides. She was even following other kids around and trying to play. She really wanted my son to be with her, but it was good to see her playing and interacting with other kids without him. She was worn out by the time we got home, which made nap time easy today.
Last night, I talked to my oldest daughter about how we could get to know each other better and improve our relationship. She is from my husband’s first marriage, so I do not know her as well as I would like to. We agreed that once a week we would play 20 questions (10 questions each) after the younger children were in bed. We would each write down 20 questions and put them in a bag for the other person. We would then pick out 10 each and answer them in a conversational manner. The questions could be anything we want. We agreed this would be the best way to start knocking walls down and build a stronger relationship.
There were a lot of other positive things today, but I thought these were the three most important ones. Seeing my children grow, each in their own way, with their individual spirits, is something I cherish. On the days where I gain access and insight into each of them, I feel like I am flying higher than a kite in the sky. Today was a great day because I reacted to different situations with a positive vibe, rather than a negative twist. I was able to harness my calm attitude and bring that calming spirit to my children. I am going to work hard to continue on this path. I will stumble, I know, but the elevated feelings that I noticed not only in myself, but also those around me is something that I would love to feel every day.